Abortion Clinic Story - Edmonton
City of Abortion Clinic/Hospital: Edmonton Alberta
My name is kitty, well, that's what most of my friends call me. When I moved to this city in 2007, I thought everything was wonderful, I had a boyfriend who loved me and starting fresh in a new place. We moved in with my elder sister while her husband was on tour with the military. Everything was perfect for almost a year. Then he and I began to do nothing but fight and have sex, to the point where we just hated the very sight of each other.
After awhile I began to get very sick, feeling dizzy and not being able to keep food down, I thought at first it was just the stomach flu but my mother had other suspicions. I then got my period and thought "Well I guess I'm not pregnant." A few weeks later I went to my doctor for my usual physical and she told me my uterus felt different and asked me to take a pregnancy test. It came back positive and all I could do was cry because I knew what I had to do and it hurt so much that some days it was hard just breathing. It was hard on me at that time because my eldest sister had her infant daughter and my other sister whom I lived with was also expecting, while everyone was getting ready to have their babies and were already raising their's, I was on my way to destroying mine.
I will never forget the endless support and love I received from my sisters, especially from my mother at what I had chosen to do with this pregnancy. I still to this day have not had the courage to tell my father. So my mother took me for an ultrasound and I forced myself not to look. Then the day came where I had my procedure. The father wasn't able to come because he didn't have I.D and you needed it to get into the building. We got there and I filled out the forms and all that song and dance.
I went into the back where they gave me adivan and told me to insert two pills into me as I was further along than what they had expected, they gave me very intense cramps, I don't think I had ever experienced physical pain of that magnitude before ! The nurse found me in the bathroom sobbing and throwing up bile as I had nothing in my stomach. She ushered me slowly into the room where they do the procedure and I laid on the table, they gave me a mask with laughing gas and it all seems fuzzy from that point. I was semi concious but I couldn't feel anything, my mom was in the room sitting behind me, stroking my hair. I remember her telling me I needed to breath deeper because my pulse was to low, then the doctor telling me I did a really good job. They slowly put me into the recovery area where I tried to eat but couldn't. I remember the girl next to me was sobbing, and I wanted to get up and give her a hug, but I couldn't make my legs work. I remember being outside, but not how I got there, smoking with my mom. Then in the car with the father, he held me and said it would be okay. I got home and wanted to go out with my family to eat, but I was so tired. mom came in and told me I did really good and that she was proud of me for being able to handle this, my boyfriend laid with me for an hour or two, then I fell asleep for about 14 hours.
Two days later, the father moved out, giving me half a hug and a "have a nice life" and I was left to deal with the emotional pain on my own. I felt disgusted with myself, that I was horrible for killing my own child because I couldn't take care of it, It eventually led me to an addiction to Ecstasy. I was out every weekend, popping pills just to forget what I had done. I kept telling myself, "This is how I will punish myself" being heavily addicted for about 4 years, until I met my husband and he weaned me off and made me healthy again. Never judging me at the choices my life has lead me to.
To this very day, every July 11th, I have to be alone so I can mourn the loss of the baby I didn't have the courage to take care of and I wouldn't wish that pain on my worst enemy, because the physical pain went away in about 3 weeks, but the emotional pain was something I almost didn't make it through. I thank the friends of mine that stuck by me through such a hard time and I will always love my mother more than anything in this whole world for holding my hand through my abortion and making me feel like I was still her daughter that she loved.
This is my story and I wanted to share it with other woman so that they know that if this is the path they want to walk, then they're not alone and that they are not a monster, or a baby killer. Just someone who's afraid and unsure about what to do or how to feel.
Note from AbortionClinics.ca – If you have a story from your experience in any of the Edmonton Abortion Clinics and you would like to share it you can submit your story here